Being A "Good Dad"

  • Brian Pollard
  • Jun 26, 2008

For My Dad

June 15th of this year was a very special day for me...I celebrated my first Father's Day! Drew was born on February 6th of this past year and needless to say being a father is as incredible as it has been described.

Since becoming a father some 5 months ago, I have had a number of people ask me this question. "So, are you a good dad?"

My response has been the same to that question.  Without hesitation, I look the person straight in the eyes and say with great humility, "ask me in twenty years."

Twenty years from now, God willing, Drew will be 20.  By God's supernatural power and grace, hopefully Michelle and I will not have messed him up too badly.

If you think about it, it's really hard to judge if you are a good parent "in the moment".  Both Michelle and I are discovering that parenting is indeed not a sprint, but a marathon.  The daily choices and decisions that we make collectively and individually that will make him a responsible adult and will ultimately point Drew to loving, serving, and surrendering his all to the King.

I am an extremely blessed man!  I have an incredible dad!  Of course he has flaws like all of us, but since becoming a father myself I have definitely gained a different point of view, especially of the challenges that my dad faced while I was under his roof.

Here are just a few of the many things that I am thankful for that I have received from my dad:

  • My dad provided me with a roof over my head and a bed to sleep in.
  • My dad provided myself and our family food in the fridge and in the cupboards so that we would never go hungry.   
  • My dad taught me the value of working hard and getting my hands dirty as I have seen it modeled in his own life.
  • My dad taught me the importance of integrity and honesty when working with people.
  • My dad taught me the importance of being trustworthy.
  • My dad taught me the importance of wrestling.  I remember countless times when we would wrestle in the living room after lunch.  For me it was a right of passage and trying to prove my manhood to him.  Needless to say, it was a long time before I could beat him.
  • My dad taught me to respect my teachers, coaches, other adults, and those who were authority figures in my life.
  • My dad expected me to follow the rules that were in place at school and expected me to follow them.  When I would get into trouble, he would not make excuses for my behavior and I would have to face whatever the consequences were.
  • My dad taught me that when I disrespected my mom, there would be consequences.
  • My dad taught me that when I made poor choices...a spanking would follow.
  • My dad taught me that when I broke curfew, I would be up extra early the next morning doing some manual labor.
  • My dad taught me the importance of being there.  I played a lot of sports when I was growing up and he never missed a game.
  • My dad taught me how to work hard and if I wanted to be the best then I would have to put in extra time shooting baskets, catching fly balls, or early morning runs.
  • My dad taught me the importance of doing my best in school.  He would attend parent teacher conferences to make sure that I was getting the grades, behaving, and treating the teachers with respect.
  • My dad taught me about saving.  From the time I arrived, my dad began to put away money so that when I left college, I had no student loans.  He had paid for it all with money he had put away the previous 18 years.
  • My dad taught me about making good choices.  I have never been embarrassed by any choices my dad has made. 
  • My dad taught me to use my brains instead of my brawn.  Not attending college was not an option.  He wanted me to aspire to have a life that was better than his.
  • My dad taught me about the importance of God.  We attended church services each week and sometimes even on vacation.  His leadership in this area of my life helped plant the seeds and laid the foundation to where I am today.

...and the list goes on!

I wish I could say that I was the perfect son, but I wasn't.  In fact, my high school years where filled with me being a selfish jerk most of the time.  I was not thankful for all that he had provided and sacrificed.

Many people choose sport figures or movies stars as their heroes, not me.  My hero has and always will be, my dad. 

I pray that I can instill at least a small portion of the lessons that my dad taught me into Drew. 

Am I a good dad?...Drew will answer that question in 20 years.

My mom and my wife, Michelle, will often joke about the many similarities and quirks that my dad and I have in common (some good, some bad..ha..ha!).  They are really apparent when we are together and in the same room!

For me, that is the greatest compliment I can be given...that I am like my dad.

I love you dad!

Happy Fathers Day!

Brian Pollard - Brian Pollard / Hope Covenant...

 

 

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